today i am unhappy

Music that rocks and rolls

and sings and lulls

too many equations

that we soundlessly compute

instead of surrendering to some

guitar strings, like love sages

plucking softly towards romance

and a voice in the background belies are sensibilities

much better than promises of our parents

or the thousand voices in our heads that never sing

but ransack are insecurites

instead of finding drums to beat into submission

or walls to shake with the reverberations of

distant gothic church choirs

calling agnus dei and shreding this silence to pieces

and tearing this stoicism into

unadulterated joy

that hints at

unspeakable beauty

that forgets about

unforgivable sins

reconciled illogically

by infinite freedom

all through some music

hum a hymn

it’s your heart

needing incalculable healing

from your irrational greiving

and your gargantuan weight of being that

found empirical proofs quickly unraveling

into the most profound disaster otherwise known

as day to day living

composing this unalterable symphony of this simple confession that

I am unhappy.

But

somehow there is a way to take this companion of silence

and just too much damn agony

enclosed in all these whiny lyrical melifluous self-degrading verses and say

this is my soul

and you can not touch it

and I am still speaking

and the music is still playing

and the beat is increasing

Will you hear it?

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