Stillborn Adulthood

Windmills that turn in space

Shooting stars tearing through the boredom of a stillborn adulthood

I lost faith in 1,000 terrestrial expectations

Owning a home

Owning a mind

Owning the ability to rationalize

And they wonder

Wonder at my hesitancy

Can’t lead

Not here first

Not the green ambition once dawning on the face of a young girl

Seasick with how it all turned out

College

This grand disappointment

This betrayal of self

I compare my years of singleness to Vietnam.

Meanwhile you laugh and see not singleness….but insanity.

I spend so much time just dissecting the taste of the air

Oxygen. Stability

Normalcy. Breaking even with existence. Just don’t be abnormal. Don’t buck tradition.

Slack right through into the only sensible place to plant an unplantable creature.

If life for them is made up of clocks, schedules, explanations from point a to b.

There is no place for me.

Rain.

Rain.

Down the drips on skyscraper planes. Vast across the surface of the sky.

I’m here. I’m grown up finally.

I’m pixels.

I’m blocks of all your misconceptions.

Hidden, buried, crammed.

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